My mum bought me a mug for my birthday a couple of years ago and this was written on the side. Pretty self-explanatory really but a salient lesson for life.
The last week and a bit I’ve not just been feeling flat, I’ve been feeling pretty fed up. For the most I’ve lacked energy. I think this is partly a physical thing and I’ve had an underlying bug which seems resilient to any shaking off. But then I’ve just reached a point that I’ve been drained of the mental energy that I’ve been devoting to changing my behaviour. All in all I’ve reached some buffers for this service and need to stop. The problem is I can’t.
Take the cycling for example, I’ve talked about recovery rides, about pacing and about keeping going. Really what I need is a complete rest and even though I’ve not been on the bike this last week and a bit I’m mentally beating myself up for not having been out on several rides piling up the miles. Yes, pretty counterproductive as I may have given the legs a rest but the mind is on overdrive.
I need some focus. Anyone who follows my twitter feed will see what a scatter gun it is, firing off thoughts and reactions seemingly at random. It’s not by happenstance, it’s a reflection of me. And so trying to develop anything new is suffering from the same problem – no focus on the priorities, no priority on focus. That’s what I need to do – I know it, I just need to act on it.
But in gathering some focus I think I also need a bit of realism. Rome wasn’t built in a day and as Mrs AB and I found out last year on our honeymoon they haven’t finished it yet! I’m trying to take on too much, solve the problems of the world in one go, be a success overnight. Again take the cycling – repeat after me: I am not a professional cyclist. Riding around like a blue arsed fly grinding out high gears and pushing on isn’t getting me anywhere. I’m not going to cover 25-30 miles in an hour. But I can cover a greater distance if I devote a bit more time. I’ll never make it at a pro level but what is it I cycle for? Enjoyment. There’s the focus for that one and now its time to put into practice properly.
So, time to get life back in focus.